Sunday, June 13, 2010
Now that's Awkward
I'm proud of my labour and my daughter's birth. I know I haven't written about it yet, but I'm still working out how I want to present it out there on the world wide web, and well, I don't really have a lot of spare time these days... it's coming.
Suffice it to say, I worked really hard, did my best, had a pain-medication-free birth even though I did end up in a hospital on pitocen (stupid arbitrary timetables). I felt overwhelmed in the moment, but strong and capable in the afterglow.
Kim, my friend and doula and the most wonderful woman to walk the earth, was by my side for the it all. She somehow managed to hold my hand, mentor Andrew, play advocate vs the nurses oh, and shoot a great video at the same time. The woman is to be admired.
But to the video, which is the point of the awkwardness. I loved my labour and I'm proud of it. I believe that birth should be viewed as a natural, beautiful part of life, but who exactly should view my labour? (Before my mother begins to have a panic-attack, I am NOT considering posting this video online. She may already be phoning, lecture on internet boundaries primed.) No, I was just at church this morning not really thinking of my birth video when confronted by Kim's 7 year-old son, Niko.
Niko sidles up beside me and says, "Hey, my mom shot a video of Katya's being born."
"Yes, she did."
"She says I can't watch it, because I don't have your permission."
"Can I watch your birth video?"
"Well, um, birth is a beautiful, natural..." (voice trailing off as I wonder where exactly I'm taking this speech).
"Or would that be awkward for you?" Asks the smiling, seven-year-old boy.
Now it would.